Complicated.

Now matter how many times I try to push myself away from you, you pull me back towards you.
I've tried to let you go, you wouldn't let me. I do not want to let you go. I want to turn you into a little stuffed Teddy bear named Rickster, to carry with me everywhere, to take to bed, to cuddle with. I don't want you to see my weaknesses, I don't want to appear as a failure at life. I want to be perfect. Perfect for you. Perfect enough that you won't forget me. I wish I wasn't so afraid. Gah, I don't even know what am saying. You make me feel clustered and oh so confused, my hearts beating as fast as a hummingbirds wings flutter.